4.24.2008

Emma Kate

For roughly the last 48 hours, my mind has been consumed with my 2ND daughter, Emma Kate. Emma Kate is currently 22 weeks along in Bethany's womb and we found out Tuesday that she most likely has a condition know as Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. I would try to explain what that is but I am not a doctor so here is a link for HLHS. In short, the left side of her heart has not formed the way that it is supposed to. Emma Kate will most likely have to have open heart surgery a few days after she is born, another when she is a few months old, and then one more a year or so after that. She will spend her life as a person with a CHD, congenital heart defect (which is a term that in 48 hours I have begun to dislike... more on that in a minute), and will probably have to deal with an overbearing dad always giving her limitations for fear of her heart.

I say all of that to say this: I praise God that she has a heartbeat. I praise God that inside of Bethany, she already has her mother and her sister's nose. I praise God that she is Fearfully and Wonderfully Made. I believe that God creates all things... ALL THINGS perfect. He does not make mistakes. He is perfectly knitting the fabrics of Emma Kate's being as I type this. This is why I have the problem with the term "defect". It makes it seem like a mistake, an accident, an error. Nothing about her or any of the people who are born with this is an error. Just a condition that causes one to fight harder, pray harder and rely harder on God.

And this is where I am stuck. How do I pray? Obviously we want Emma Kate to have a healthy heart. We want on Wednesday morning to hear the Specialist say, "there must be some mistake, you don't need to be here. Her heart is perfectly healthy". Is it selfish to fall down on my knees and say "God, please heal her now. Please heal her so she doesn't have to go through all of this"? Is it wrong to not expect a miracle? Is it wrong to pray these things and then continue to research this condition with the anticipations that these surgeries will be a necessity? I am thankful that God has given wisdom to the men and women who perform these surgeries. What a miracle it must be to touch and infants heart and help it beat.

I pray that God will be given the glory in all these things, regardless of the situation. I pray He heals Emma Kate, either in the womb or through the doctors after she is born. I pray that God will give encouragement, wisdom, reassurance, comfort and patience to both myself and Bethany.

And I pray that I can become more concerned with others than just with myself. Why is it that we become advocates of a cause only when it directly affects ourselves, or our own gain? I long to care for the people of this world as Jesus did. To put him first, then others, then myself.

Please pray for our sweet Emma Kate. She is nestled up comfy and cozy inside Bethany right now and knows nothing different. Pray that God will be glorified throughout his healing of her heart. And pray for the other little children that are in various stages of surgeries as God heals their hearts.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Brooks,
What a beautiful picture you paint for us of Emma Kate, a picture from her heavenly Father's perspective. We pray for God's miracle in her life. God doesn't make mistakes. He knew exactly where her home would be--a home you and Bethany made and where He trusted you enough to bless you with her life and meet her every need.
Thank you for being you.
We love you,
dixie

Anonymous said...

Brooks,
Emma Kate is so lucky to have a dad like you!! The whole time I was reading your blog, a verse came to mind. James 1:5 & 6. Remember that if you ask God and believe with all your heart, He will grant you the wisdom that you are seeking. Thank you for your blog! Take care and my God bless you and your family!

Jennifer L.

Jenna said...

Hey Brooks,

I just wanted you to know that I am praying for you and Bethany and your sweet girls! God is already being glorified just through your words in this post, and I know He will continue to get the glory as His plan for your sweet baby girl's life play out. I am praying for a miracle and also for God to give y'all peace and wisdom as you go through all of this. You and Beth are amazing parents, and I am so glad that God entrusted Emma Kate to y'all. She is one blessed babe. :)

Love y'all,
Jenna

Anonymous said...

Brooks and Bethany,

I am a a friend of Dixie and Lamar's through lacrosse. I am also a labor and delivery nurse. You have been in our prayers since Dixie shared the news. You will continue to be as well. In my work I have seen God work so many miracles and the blessings that all who come in contact with families such as yours are amazing. Please know that God, the Almighty God is not only working on Emma Kate and your family right now, but he is also preparing the medical teams that will work with you. I will pray for them too!
"defect" is a harsh word, like you say and implies a mistake, but the names that these conditions receive are given by man, who is imperfect. Your daughter has a heart that beats as you said. She is in a blessed place in Bethany's womb, no better place for her.
I just want you to know that you have already impacted so many through this trial your family is facing.
Please know we continue to lift you in prayer and love you as fellow members of Christ's family.
Love in Christ, the Alpha and Omega,
Laci Wallin

Anonymous said...

Hey Brooks,

I will be praying for you guys. We do serve a God that does miracles and heals. But, I do understand your dilemna. I will be praying for His will to be done and I will also pray for healing. I can imagine this must be a difficult thing to go through. Anna Brooke is beautiful by the way...and I'm sure Emma Kate will be too. Congratulations!

JROCK... :)

Anonymous said...

Brooks,
You and Bethany thought long and hard before naming Emma Kate.

Emma - German. Adj) Whole, complete, universal. Definition of Whole - free of wound or injury, recovered from a wound or injury, restored, being healed, free of defect or impairment, physically sound and healthy, free of disease or deformity, having all of its proper parts or components. Synonym - perfect.

n. implies that nothing has been omitted, ignored, abated or taken away. Entire - may suggest a state of completeness or perfection to which nothing can be added.

Kate - derived from Catherine - English - Pure - free from what vitiates, weakens or pollutes. Containing nothing that does not properly belong. Being thus and no other.

Kristopher derived from Christopher, Greek - Bearing Christ, to bear, to carry.

Emma Kate - whole, complete, perfect.

Brooks,
You have wondered all of your life what you should do, where you should be. God in His Wisdom has placed you in Birmingham, where he has sent His Angels in the form of Bethany's OB/GYN Christian practice to prepare you for what is to come with Emma Kate. This perfect, whole beautiful daughter, who you will bear and carry in this the most critical first year of her life. God does do miracles. We know first hand through how He healed me through thousands of prayers sent up to Him on my behalf. But he has already worked miracles by placing you where you are, preparing you for what may be ahead.

I love you so much. I am so proud of you and how God is revealing His plan for your life through this Whole, Complete, Perfect daughter. Trust in Him, Kristopher Brooks, you can handle all things through Him. What a miracle you are receiving in Emma Kate.

What a perfect name for her. I love her already and Kiki can't wait to hold her and love her.

I love you so much,

Mom

Anonymous said...

Brooks,
As a nurse in the neonatal ICU, I am often asked - "How can you work with sick babies?,it is so sad." I always have the same answer- It is very sad to see innocent babies born very sick- but there is no better feeling when you are able to actually witness the miracle of God's healing- no matter what the condition. It is so awesome to be able to see miracles happen first hand. Today, doctors, through the hands of God, are able to repair tiny hearts and do amaizing things. It happens everyday. One of our neonatologists in Macon comes from the NNICU in Birmingham. They have wonderful pediatric surgens and neonatologists. We are praying for you and your family.
Love you guys- Miranda

Megan said...

Welcome to the blogging world! We are so glad to still be part of your lives & join you as you pray for Emma Kate. Todd was so encouraged by your faith after your short chat yesterday. We are confident God is going to be with each of you every step of the way. I'm looking forward to seeing what God does in your lives through this situation. If you guys need anything don't hesitate to call!

Erika said...

Our son is 2, HLHS, and facing the third surgery (the Fontan) on May 21. He's active, bright - and other than the scar, you'd never know he's a heart kid!

Please - do not hesitate to email me if you have any questions or just want to talk to another heart parent.

BTW, our son's website is http://www.babysamson.com