Diagnosis

We saw Dr. John Owen, Maternal and Fetal Medicine specialist, this morning and he confirmed that Emma Kate has Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. During the ultrasound, we were able to see Emma Kate's entire body, (she will be beautiful like Anna Brooke :) ) and everything was forming in a good manner with exception to her heart. We saw her heart up close and through coloring on the ultrasound were able to see blood flow in and out of her ventricles. The left ventricle is smaller than what it is supposed to be as is the aorta. This is obviously critical because this controls blood flow throughout her body (right ventricle pumps blood to the lungs, left ventricle pumps blood throughout the body. She is fine now because instead of using her lungs, she is using Bethany to breathe so it is not a stress on her heart). Dr. Owen said that we need to see a pediatric cardiologist to discuss any questions about what will happen when Emma Kate is born. We are scheduled to see Dr. Colvin tomorrow morning at 9:30 am CST. He will take a look at Emma Kate and give us more of an overview of what will happen when she is born (norwood to fontan surgeries or heart transplant).

To say how I am feeling right now is difficult. My heart is broken that the flesh of my flesh is hurting and I cannot help her. I feel weak and helpless for what my daughter will go through. I am terrified of needles (although terrified probably isn't strong enough a word) but I would go through it all so that she wouldn't have to. I am clinging to the promise that God's grace is sufficient. His power is made perfect in our weakness.

I also firmly believe that God is in control. In the garden Jesus asked God to take the cup away. This was my prayer. Please take this cup away from Emma Kate. But Jesus was faithful to His purpose. Not my will, but Yours be done. What a difficult prayer to pray!

But this is our prayer: God, we do not understand Your ways but we know that Your ways are perfect. Though they may seem difficult at first, Your ways are right. Your ways are best. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are Your ways higher than my ways and Your thoughts are better than my thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth, so is Your word that goes out from Your mouth: It will not return to You empty, but will accomplish what You desire and achieve the purpose for which You sent it".